A good friend recently sent me some thoughts titled “Eight Principles of Disicpleship.” It outlined many aspects of discipleship, some of which I have touched on in previous blogs. However one stood out for me that was a great reminder:

 

“True discipleship occurs only when the disciple assumes the primary responsibility for his/her growth.”

I had to laugh. How many times have I tried to convince someone that their next step was a deeper relationship with God and that I was willing to walk alongside them. At times some agreed and we would begin the discipling journey together, only to watch their frustration grow at the same rate of my frustration with them. “Why don’t they want this” I would often muse, only to realize looking back that they never really wanted to take responsibility for their growth. They had always been in the mindset of being spoon fed and had no intention of ever making much of an effort to grow in their relationship with God.

Now hear me on this – I don’t in anyway want to judge them (I often did that in the past) or think of them as less than me.

I don’t know why some want to take their relationship with God seriously and some don’t. I’ve had that conversation with God on many occasions. I’ve had many conversations with people about it as well and they also don’t have an answer.

The Spirit moves in ways that we will never fully understand. People choose in ways that we will never fully understand.

A young father with 3 young children will claim that he is too busy to meet regularly, while at the same time, another young father in the same circumstances will see meeting with someone to disciple him imperative if he is going to be the role model for this wife and children he believes he is called to be. Why two different responses? I don’t know.

That is not for me to decide. It is what it is.

What is for me to decide is who I will choose to spend my time with. I don’t want to spend my energy “dragging” someone along the discipleship road if they have no intention of taking it seriously – it doesn’t help either of us.

I want to make sure that I am coming alongside someone who wants to “assume the primary responsibility for his/her growth.”

It is September. Many people will have had some time to think over the summer and are ready to take the next step. If they are, we need to be ready and willing to embrace them for this journey. If they aren’t, we’ll wait for another day. We’ll let the Spirit work mysteriously and be ready for when we are called upon.

For the kingdom