As much as I espouse having some preset activities for every discipling relationship that I engage with (scripture memory, prayer, curriculum, serving), I must always recognize that each person is unique and that their journey as such will be unique. If I don’t keep this before me, I will treat each person as though they were on an assembly line and fail to see how they have been created individually.

I have probably made more errors on this aspect than any other over the years. I am forever thankful for some of the great guys that I have had the privilege of leading who were bold enough to push back when they felt that I was not engaging with them in ways that were meaningful to who they were. It is during those moments that you must be willing to eat humble pie, learn from those you are leading, and make adjustments to the journey.

It is also important to keep in mind that these differences come in a variety of forms.

There are personality differences. Some individuals have deeper sensitivities to various aspects of the journey while others are less so. Some find security in structure and a clear agenda while others are more free flowing in their approach. Some look for the many details, while others are looking to see the big picture learning. None are wrong, just different.

Beyond personality, there are different passions. This becomes obvious with the various topics you will cover. Some will naturally engage in certain topics simply due to their passions. Be conscious that you can learn to understand some topics more intimately when you hear someone with a deeper passion for it talk about it and how they see it impacting themselves and the world.

Family situations are also huge factors in the disicpling relationship. Someone who is in the middle of raising children in elementary school will approach things much differently than a single 22 year old. Someone working through marriage difficulties will see aspects of God differently than someone who is enjoying a vibrant relationship.

There is also a person’s academic bent. Some enjoy reading and study while others were happy that they made it through high school; books just aren’t their thing.

All of these differences should not in any way completely sway the discipling process. We all need to be stretched outside of our comfort zones for learning to take place. Yet as you lead others, always be aware of the uniqueness of each individual. Leverage who they are, learn from each of them yourself, and you will enjoy the variety of the body of Christ.

For the Kingdom.